11 November, 2014

Incoming grandparents: Reactions

I'm a day late with this one, but you'll forgive me, right? This is the last post about my grandparents. I think. For now. So... Having strangers walking through your apartment isn't fun. In all this time I haven't called them "grandparents" once! I just randomly say: "Who wants water?" or something like that. I can't say "grandma" and "grandpa" to them. It's not even fair to my "real" grandparents from my mother's side who were there with me and for me my whole life. I find it hard to call them like that even when I'm talking to my friends. They are unknown people to us. And they were living here for three days. It's not that easy. Not as it seems. As weird as this whole experience was, my father and aunt made it the weirdest ever. I told my mom that this is probably the worst weekend I ever lived through. This could have been so much easier if my father was more normal. My mom told him that he and his sister are so much worse than their parents. (Because my father thinks he's so much better than them.) These three days wouldn't be as bad as they were, but these fights all the time were just too much. I can't understand how my father and aunt could act like this. I mean, they haven't seen their parents in few years (my aunt went to see them 3 times, and my father once in these 23 years of how long they haven't been living here). I know it's hard to deal with old people, technology has run them over, they can't hear or see as they used to, they wander and can't stay concentrated as long as we expect them to... It's annoying but normal. No need to yell at them. I get really annoyed by my grandparent when they figure something out, but I understand. My father doesn't. I don't think I ever spoke more badly of my father than in these few last posts. Last two weeks or more, I saw that we bonded a bit, everything was going good. Why? Because I decided to let go. I decided that I'll try to forget all of his stupid actions. And that's the only way for us to function, if I play dumb and by his rules. I can't say I was fine with it, but it broke the the tensions in the house so I was happier. After this, I can't even function like before. I also think these were the posts that I let you in the most. This is basically my every day. Tensions, crying, worrying. My father. And I'm only 20. Actually 19 and 10/12. Shouldn't I still be carefree? I know I shouldn't be pushed down by my father for sure.
Don't you ever forget this!!! It must be earned.

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