There are no words...

Hi.

There are not enough words to express what I am feeling right now. Simply, I'm depressed, but there are lots of emotions mixing up inside of me. I was looking at some old photos of me, my family and my friends from elementary and high school. I miss them so much! Nobody in particular, just all of them. As a group, as a class, as a, once, a family! I was just telling my friend that I miss those days when it didn't matter what you are wearing, how you look, who you hang out with or how much money you have... Everything was about pure friendship and playing together. Don't you miss that? Times when you didn't have to question somebody's loyalty and trust. Don't you miss the times when it was fun to ring a doorbell and run? Simple and, most of the times, stupid things like that made us laugh and we were happy with nothing. And today you have to be popular, rich, know the right people to become somebody. I remember the time when my dad was a hero. I was so proud of him. I took every opportunity I could to hug him. Now, we don't even have anything to talk about. It's sad, isn't it? Also, what's up with friends? We were once so great together. Now, I don't know who is where, what they are doing... I just wanna cry over it. (And I did.) I was so happy lately, I knew it will be over soon. I was happy since I started talking to Mr. M. He was my new "hope", something I was focused on. He is popular hot guy, and I'm not that kind of girl. And he still talks to me without holding back. He doesn't make a difference between us like most people do. Popular hang out with popular, geeks with geeks... You know how it goes. So, I was happy. Something had to ruin that. Sooner or later. To be honest, it kinda came later but still... I wasn't prepared. I never am. Today, everybody's your friend till they don't need you anymore. I'm lucky enough to have my two best friends that I would trust my life with. I hope that will remain like that till the end of time. Everything I wasn't thinking about is now coming out. And it's not pretty. I'm loosing hope and faith. In friends, in love, in trust, in my dad...

I want everything back!

Crying helps!