Hey you :)
I only have an hour of freedom so I have to type fast. What am I talking about? My grandparents are coming and they're staying at our place for a few days. That normally wouldn't be a problem, but we don't have typical grandparents-granddaughter relationship. We haven't seen each other for about 10 years. There are few reasons why, I won't get into that. We talk on the phone once a month and on birthdays and holidays, but that's not really a relationship we should have. I know I'm blood related to them, and that's pretty much all I can feel for them. They're not really my grandparents. And I have no idea how to act around them, what to say, what to ask... I can't ask "What's new?" because I don't even know what's old. I know almost nothing about them. Last time they (actually only grandma) visited, she stayed at my aunt's place and we only went there for two days. And I was too little to know what awkward is. I only cared for the golden pendant she gave me. I'm over that material phase, so now I have to bond with them. But how? I have to be polite, communicative and really happy they're here but I'm not. I don't have any other emotion than "awkward!". It was planned that me and my family go to them but something happened and now sides are reversed. I was looking forward to going to their place because I was interested. And I love traveling and sightseeing. And now I'm doomed. At least I feel like that. Please tell me what to do!! Like awkwardness isn't enough, I have a big test on Tuesday, so I really really need to study. And I'm going to feel really stupid for being closed in my room all weekend. But I have to have my priorities. And, unfortunately, they're not it. I'm connected to them only because of my father. I never actually needed them, I have my other grandparents, family, friends (...), so I can't say they weren't here when I needed them. They just weren't here. No feelings. I'll keep you posted!
Wish me luck, bye
- ♥
All blurry in my head. |
No comments:
Post a Comment